A Hangover Worth Hangin On To

Photo by Kristin Fellows

On October 1st I married my soul mate. Steve is the one I've been waiting for my whole life in some ways and also the one that I was not ready for until now. We both had a soul-list of things to do, children to raise with other people, lessons to learn. In many ways, our meeting was the prize for all we had accomplished, for struggles that we had gone through and tough decisions we had made.

Steve and I both resisted marriage from the get-go. It was a dirty word that came with our own baggage, yes, but also the baggage of generations. After more than five years together, we continued to look deeper into that. Conversations led to epiphanies and we started to see our possible marriage as an opportunity to rewrite the old story. This took on a life of it's own and appointed us stewards. In short, our union became much bigger than the two of us.

And so one thing led to another and planning began. Our cottage getaway in the mountains north of Asheville was the perfect venue for a magical event. The land was crystal gridded by Sarah Thomas for the ceremony and friends and family contributed and helped ready the space. My favorite holiday, Samhain or Halloween, was a fitting theme for this non-conventional marriage. We prepared for a gothic wedding with a burning cauldron ceremony at the beginning to send the old stories and beliefs about marriage up in smoke. Our guests were asked to hiss and boo as Steve and I read our list, that included such things as "marriage is a ball and chain, a woman should take her husband's name, marriage is only between a man and a woman, you have to sacrifice your own dreams for your spouse, marriage is the end of freedom, he's making an honest woman out of me, etc, etc." We had planned to burn the list with a special mix that was to send it up in a fireball. However, the powers that be felt the list should not go up in fanfare, but should quietly smoulder itself out in an inconsequential deathing. And so it is.

My Sister and mentor, Anyaa McAndrew officiated and my Magdalene Sister, Rebecca Chaplin gave communion and a beautiful blessing. Steve's two sons and my daughter and two sons stood with us, and those we love best sat in witness. It became a sacred ceremony and our guests shared later that they felt in an altered state or the land seemed as if it were part of another world. One friend posted the next day on facebook that she woke in a bliss-filled hangover state, and others agreed. Our little wedding, where Steve and I both committed to Change, and holding that space of transformation with each other, became a humble statement of a new paradigm of conscious equal partnership. We are not the first, of course, but we hope that our ceremony contributed to a more evolved, whole and aware kind of union. 

If we are connected on facebook, you've seen an exhausting stream of photos being posted on my timeline by friends and photographers. And so, when I was called to share this with my greater email list, I asked the question...."what's in it for them?"

And, of course, the answer came quickly and was far from rocket science. When one is in a state of Bliss, it creates a high vibration bubble where beauty is seen in everything and love is felt for all. Desires are manifested quickly and all those around that "bliss-filled" person are raised up as well. It's a short-cut-crash-course in 5D consciousness. Bliss is contagious and at some point in the not-too-distant future, it will take over and there will be no turning back.

Blissfully in Love and So Happy to Share the Magic, Raven

the message from the back of our wedding program...

Our wish for you is this:

Instead of fearfully falling, constricting or even crashing in Love,

May you Rise, Slowly and Untethered, Gently, Deeply,

Free from Old Stories and Outdated Beliefs.

May you Discover Yourselves Again and Again

through the Vehicle of Love With no Conditions.

In Deep Gratitude,

Raven & Steve

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©2020 Raven Sinclaire